A Letter to My Sons

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I read this in The Huffington Post… If you haven’t already seen it, click the title to open the whole article.

And be glad we don’t live in India!

Some really horrible things happened to someone who could be one of your friends, and it was done by some people who could be your friends. Remember how we talk all the time about how we’re the people who help, who fix things when there’s a problem or someone’s in trouble? You may get the chance to do that someday. Because those boys who say nasty things about girls may actually do something to those girls. If you are ever anywhere where boys start hurting a girl, or touching her in any way that she doesn’t want, you need to step in. If she’s asleep or drunk or passed out or drugged and can’t say “no,” you need to step in.

Click underlined title to continue…

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2 Responses to A Letter to My Sons

  1. Sufiya says:

    So, where’s the letter to the girls telling them that drinking puts them at risk? That they should be a bit more proactive about ensuring their own safety? That a little common sense goes a long long way towards ensuring nothing like this ever happens to THEM?

    Nobody forced those drinks down that girl’s throat; she was even warned to slow down/to stop and she kept right on going. I myself was almost raped by two guys when I was in my early twenties, and I freely admit , I was naive and i ignored certain signals that , in retrospect, I realized would have warned me these two had evil intentions…however one smart thing I did was NOT to drink, so I was stone cold sober; plus I had martial arts training that enabled me to disable the one guy so that I could jump out of the moving car (it was slowing to stop at a red light, which, unfortunately, turned green before the car had come to a complete stop, so I had to strike at that moment and not waste the opportunity!) I was able to judo-roll out on to the pavement (thank God automatic door locks were not a common feature back in 1977 or I would have been in REAL trouble!) and fortunately the two miscreants then took off like a shot!

    Having in this way experienced for myself the benefits of abstention from alcohol, I have no patience and no sympathy for those who overindulge and then wind up in trouble as a result. And rape/molestation is one of those results, as any woman with an iota of sense would realize if she took half a second to think about it.. I think those two young men deserved everything they got as a result of their actions, but you will never hear me agree ‘the victim was blameless” in this case. SHE chose to drink and put herself at risk and so to my way of thinking she certainly has to accept responsibility for making her own self a ‘victim”.

  2. motleydragon says:

    I am glad you were able to escape, although it is clear that bitter and angry feelings are still evoked by the memory. Women and girls need to be reminded, powerfully and frequently, about putting themselves at risk in dangerous situations. But many women are still naive or innocent victims, taken advantage of by people they know, in situtions that should be safe, alone by necessity rather than choice, or overwhelmed by stronger men, sometimes acting in groups.

    It is stil good advice!

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